Re: DCHS etiquette

Then, unfortunately, I guess we sharply disagree about basic courtesy.

For me, again, it is all a matter of the amount of time one person (or a couple) has already spent in a pool. When you include the amount of time as an essential element of the equation, as I repeatedly and emphatically have, the question becomes, to use your (apt) words, what is "reasonable pool usage at DCHS"? The operative word here is "reasonable." It seems plain as day to me that "reasonable pool usage" would mean that if an unaccompanied male has already spent several hours in a particular pool or spot, then it is reasonable for him to leave the couple just a few minutes to enjoy the spot by themselves. And vice versa, if the guy indicates he wants that. Seems to me that reasonable pool usage means we can and should all give each other a little space or alone-time when the place allows for that, and if people indicate they would appreciate some of it. Seems as though that would make DCHS a better, more courteous and happier place for everybody overall.

What courtesy and "reasonable pool usage" does not mean, as I keep saying, is that a couple or anyone's "claim" to the pools automatically "supercedes" (the word you just used) that of any one else's. Your latest post just now injected that concept again, despite my repeated pains to show how sharply distinct that idea is from the courtesy and "reasonable usage" I am talking about. Concretely: What I am talking about has nothing to do with a couple coming to a pool and finding an unaccompanied male in it and saying to him, "Okay, buster, we're a couple so get out" ...or spending a short while sharing the pool with the guy and then announcing, "Okay, dude, you've had your five minutes with us so shake the spot." Your words like "supercede" and "trump" exclude time durations as an essential element of the equation, they exclude what is reasonable, they put the focus on some sort of non-existent "rights" rather than on courtesy. That's the strawman again. That strawman position is not my position.

It is perplexing, to me, that we differ so widely about what courtesy would mean under the circumstances I have put out for discussion. But I guess we have to agree to disagree. I simply remind us all again of the Golden Rule, since it surely seems that giving a little bit of alone-time to people who want it, after they've spent hours deprived of it, would be doing for them as we would have them do for us. Seems to me that is just simple courtesy.



Edited 5 time(s). Last edit at 09/09/2010 05:20PM by mellowguy.