Re: DCHS etiquette

Wizard, We seem closer to agreement on these issues now, or at least as close as we are going to be. Just a few matters of final (I hope) elucidation:

Some people are by nature courteous and considerate to others; other people are not.

In my experiences at the springs, the overwhelming majority of people there are courteous and considerate (though some can be loud, drowning out the tranquility of the place -- unfortunately for people like me who prefer the tranquility -- but that is the loud people's prerogative).

Some people will insist on doing whatever they personally feel like doing at DCHS, even while knowing (and not caring) how uncomfortable it makes others in their presence, while other people will compromise a little for the sake of those around them and the general tranquility of the area.

It's like two people standing and talking in the center of a grocery aisle: Some will stand there, making everyone else walk around them, figuring it is a public aisle and that they have as much right to be in the middle as others have to walk in the middle, so they will be damned if they are going to relinguish their chosen space to others, until they are good and ready to do so. Others will immediately move aside to let others easily pass, out of an inner sense of courtesy.

Some people would be courteous if they knew what the general etiquette was in an area and knew that the regulars at the place all expected them to practice such an etiquette. Others do not give a f-k and would not be courteous even if they knew that general etiquette.

My post was aimed at publishing a point of etiquette so that the type of people who are inclined to be courteous toward others could know it and internalize it when they are at the springs. My post was not about compelling people who do not have any inner sense of courtesy to suddenly acquire it. Nor was my post aimed to derive the various methods in which to demand or compel intractably discourteous people to conform their behavior to what is courteous (although the suggestions along those lines, such as Celtfire's, have all been helpful!). In substance, my post was aimed at sending a message to people akin to those who stand in the center of grocery aisles, telling them it is discourteous for them to just stand there. Some would abide by that public notion of courtesy the next time they go to the grocery store; others would ignore whatever the rest of us posted in unison.

The etiquette in small towns is generally imbued with substantial courtesy. The more places get crowded, the more natural courtesy seems to slip away. That is happening at DCHS, but I hope that whatever vestiges of courtesy and consideration remain at DCHS under present conditions can be supported and strengthened.

There are some people who go to DCHS who would never go there were it not for their possibility of seeing unclothed females. But even of those people, some are more courteous than others. Some will give females and couples who want peace and quiet their space; others won't give an inch. An inch was all my post was asking (a few minutes of alone-time, against hours, at times when alone-time is available at DCHS).

While at DCHS, there are people who choose a pool or area and would choose the exact same pool or area even if they had the whole DCHS area to themselves; others choose a pool or area for the sole or primary reason that a nude female or couple happens to be in that spot. Of the latter people, some will get their eyefull for a while and then leave the woman or couple some peace, i.e, leave the woman or couple to themselves for a little while, in the particular pool or creek location. Others of that group will not give the woman or couple even two minutes of peace, no cherished time whatsoever for them to be outside anyone's vision but the woman or couple's own.

Such inconsiderate and discourteous people, usually men, are obvious, some more obvious than others. I know them, we know them. Some may well be reading this post. They know when their sole or primary purpose for being in a particular spot at a particular time at DCHS is to perv on the woman or couple who happens to be in that exact same spot at that time. We don't need to "prove" who they are and what they are really up to; they are their own judge and jury. They know their motives with 100% certainty, but besides that, their behavior and energy often makes what they are doing plain to the rest of us. We (I think I am supported here) are just asking them to back off a little bit. If nothing else, that would make DCHS a more inviting place for the very women and couples such pervs come to see yet deter away in substantial numbers.

P.S. -- Wizard, you're right about not getting a PM from me. I sent one to some of the other responders in this topic stream and thought I had included you. My mistake for thinking I had.

And about the strawman, I know that was not your intent. I just wanted to be clear that intent or not, the position you were arguing against was far removed from my own actual position.

P.S.S. -- Paul P, you're right that I would give a couple the courtesy of some time alone, if I knew they wanted it and especially if I had already soaked for a couple of hours anyway in the spot. Maybe I am alone in that among male DCHS users (although people such as those at Soakersforum.com -- and the Japanese! -- et al., seem to share my view about this). But it also appears that 2 or 3 of the other responders in this stream indicated they would extend a couple that courtesy as well. And from your other posts, you likewise seem like a courteous person. You don't seem like the kind of guy who would refuse to extend the small amount of courtesy that I am talking about (a few minutes of alone-time) under the circumstances I am talking about (when you've already been able to enjoy the spot for hours anyway). Nor can I imagine that you would be completely happy and accepting of the fact that, out of an entire day, a single guy would not give you and your wife even five minutes of alone-time, say in the shower area or other unique spot at DCHS. But feel free to correct me if I am wrong.

Cheers.



Edited 4 time(s). Last edit at 09/08/2010 12:54PM by mellowguy.